Author Archives: Jazmine Occeus

Post 3.3

This source is not a scholarly article but is on that does have an authoritative feel to is because it is from the Guardian an English newspaper company. What makes it authoritative is when they write they also source where they get there information and you feel like they are a reliable source. The title is Ocean acidification can cause mass extinctions, fossils reveal. I actually enjoyed this article because they did a comparison between a meteoroid and the effects of carbon pollution . They do not really ask a question but they do address how the population that we are producing a slow rising and becoming very similar to the meteoroid that hit the Earth and caused mass extinction. However, now applying the question you asked I see how they could have added more details or linked there resources. I think I am going to stay clear from articles like this unless I feel that It would be very supportive for my question. I still have to find a focus question but I think it is going to be on the lines of living with or reversing the impacts of acidity in our oceans. I might even focus on a particular set of waters or different theories that some say that could help.

Jazmine 2.4

  • What are you proud of in this draft? What’s working well?

I am proud of the fact that I was actually able to formulate a clear and precise claim, that is not confusing and states exactly what I want to say.

  • More broadly, what do you think your strengths as a writer are? Why?

I think my strengths would be describing things because its the one place that you can be wordy without being too wordy. There is always room for more details when explaining something visual.

  • What are the most important issues to address in revising Essay 2? Why?

To maintain the focus of my claim throughout my essay while supporting it with details.

  • What are your goals for revising? (Share your 2 “radical revision” steps you’ll take, too.)

To complete a strong, clear and precise lens analysis without adding too much information or losing my focus.

 

 

Crazy for Chocolate

 For many people chocolate is a part of their culture. For instance in winter you have hot chocolate and in the summer you have chocolate ice cream, but due to climate change, the rise in temperatures are making it harder for Theobroma cacao (Coco trees) to produce the chocolate beans. For Theobroma cacao they require a moist and humid environment however, in the past years the climate has been hotter then usually and instead of the humid climate which are ideal for these trees it has been drier causing many to worry,if chocolate could go extinct. Although that is the extremist thoughts it is frightening that if temperatures keep rising we may not be able to enjoy chocolate no more or at the quantities we do now.
Questions
What could be some alternatives to producing chocolate?
Why is it important that the climate remains humid?
Do you think this is a important issue? Why or why not.

2.2

 

Draft

It’s cold and wet. It feels like the perfect  horror scene, a deserted eerie night full of fog that that creepy neighbor that know one ever sees pop up and snatches you. It is creepy and unnerving but yet it is peaceful and simple. The fog blurring everything in the background except for one single carry cart. No logo indicating where it belongs and nothing in it indicating that someone used it is. It is just there in the middle of  the fog, in the night, alone in an empty car lot. The colors bleak white with light post blurred in the back with dark gray concrete and a black pushing cart in the center of the photo.

 

 

Revision

The night is still and you are in the middle of a parking lot. There is nothing in site, you look out into the lot and you see fog. Fog so thick that the only thing you can see is the lights in the lot in the background and a very lonesome cart. Positioned perfectly, centered is a cart with nothing in it. It looks eerie, one single cart in the middle of the lot surrounded by fog with no one in sight. Alone. The simplicity of the view and the hard contrast of the dark gray concrete and the misty cloud white fog make it seem unreal and unnerving.

 

Reflect on this activity

At first I thought I did a good job in describing the picture however, after watching the video I realized that I still managed to put my own input. For instance in the draft I start of by saying it is cold and wet, but I do not know that I am simply assuming based of  what I felt would be appropriate in the context of this photo. So in the revision I tried to still get the creepy feeling I got across while just describing what I see without my own personal input.

Post 1.2

In “Climate Change is Violence” , A excerpt from her book call “The Encyclopedia of Trouble and Spaciousness“. In this particular piece you see how Rebecca Solnit stresses the importance of climate change and our response to it. She does this first by appealing to the readers ability to relate between two categories being extremely wealthy and not. This establish the role and tone for the article by allowing the reader to identify with a group and then read on the effects on that specific group. She stresses in the excerpt that Climate Change is not just something that is happening but something that directly impacts us and something that we should take serious/action against. She addresses this using pathos explaining the disproportion of harm in other countries with the effect of Climate change on food, ethos by appealing to the readers morals of right and wrong and logos by explaining the current effects of Climate Change that we all have access to knowing such as the French Revolution. Ultimately, she uses many methods to convey that Climate change is violence against us, and it is something that can be change but it has to be unified and the only way that can happen is if we change our view and the narrative of Climate Change.

Analyzing a Sentence

I recently had to read a book called “When it Rains it F-N Pours” by Mirian, and a sentence I would like to highlight is ” I hope that you will not judge me for the mistakes in my grammar and syntax in my writing , but judge me instead for the content and meaning behind my life experiences.” At first when I read this sentence I thought of it as a de-briefer, If that make sense. As if the author was telling us to read at our own risk. However, after really looking at it, I realized for me this sentence made the book feel real. For me, this sentence meant the author was stripping away her professionalism, her formality; which sometimes create a barrier between the reader and author, and she made me feel as if I was there in the moment with her. Through this sentence I gained a sense of normalcy with the author, which let me know that this probably was not going to be the best piece of writing I have read but probably more inspirational and forward telling then most.